Relationships are a difficult aspect of life to maintain and keep healthy. Although there may be difficulties at home people tend to work them out by talking, going to therapy or counseling. Not always the case as people do tend to step out on their lovers quite a lot.
Suspicions of an affair are just that, suspicions. There will not be proof easily found as the cheater will hide what they are doing, but there are signs you can pay attention to that will uncover the truth.
If so, there’s a good chance that bad behavior is happening outside of the relationship. Keep an eye out for new passwords on phones or computers, erased texts and browser history, or for weird possessive behavior of their personal electronics.
Honestly, what could possibly be on those devices that they don’t want anyone to see?
Cheater Sign #3. Off the Grid for Extended Periods of Time
Has money suddenly evaporated from joint accounts? Retirement and savings accounts shrinking inexplicably? Seeing way more cash transactions or random corner store purchases?
Cheating costs money. Gifts, trips, dinners out, and hotel rooms can add up quickly.
When you notice money missing and their explanation sounds fishy, trust your instincts – especially if the money is going to places you rarely frequent or have never gone to. (A caveat here is gift-giving occasions such as your birthday or an anniversary. Check the calendar before you let your suspicions run too far!)
Long term couples bond to each other through a process called “emotional intimacy.” When couples share secrets, desires, and other important parts of our lives with each other, the process connects and bonds them together.
So, when your lover is no longer emotionally available or intimate, it could be a sign that their attention is elsewhere – potentially on the affair partner.
Cheater Sign #10. Confrontation Leads to Deflection
If you’ve confronted your spouse with their suspicions, then listen closely for their response. If they start to list off everything that you have “failed” to do, or otherwise start trying to put you on the defense, then you may have your answer.
Like we said before, trust your instincts. If your gut is telling you that your spouse is cheating, then it’s worth investigating.
Do not ignore that sense!
Adultery is a Grounds for Divorce
Beyond any moral issues with the practice, Maryland considers adultery to be a crime against marriage. (Admittedly, it’s a misdemeanor crime that carries a $10 fine and is rarely prosecuted in modern times, but still!)
In our state, absolute divorce means the total termination of the legally binding marriage. In the eyes of Maryland courts, after absolute divorce, each party is free to see other people and remarry.
In addition, adultery can be used as a reason for filing an at-fault divorce. Fault divorces typically weigh the divorce decree in favor of the injured party – in this case, the one who was cheated on.
After all, the court’s final divorce decree will be the last word in dividing finances, assets, or child custody. In that case, you don’t want to be the one who’s legally found to be at fault for causing the dissolution of the marriage.
If both parties willingly want to end the relationship, then an MSA can help everyone save some money and come to a more agreeable outcome than an at-fault divorce. (It helps that the lawyer for the injured party can leverage the proof of adultery to ensure that the MSA proceeds smoothly. That’s because if the two parties can’t agree during an MSA mediation, then the next step is court – and the court may come down harder on the cheater than anything negotiated in private!)
Having a good family lawyer on your side can help you come up with the right strategy to handle an adulterous affair. JC Law offers free initial consultations at your convenience, so let us know how we can help guide you through an emotional time.