When you reach the end of the road in a marriage, the next step is crucial to moving on and starting over. The divorce takes a physical and emotional toll on you, your soon-to-be ex-spouse, and any children from the relationship. There is a more effortless and better way, divorce mediation. Here are the 12 reasons it is the right choice for the end of your marriage:
Reason #12: Involves Only You and Your Spouse
Divorce mediation is between you and your spouse. The facilitator, either a mediator or attorney, keeps the conversation focused on the issues involved in the divorce, such as alimony, child support, custody, etc. The agreement on the terms of those issues is entirely up to the parties involved in the discussion.
Reason #11: Mediation is A Less Adversarial Process Than Divorce Litigation
A courtroom immediately invokes confrontation. A court pits spouses and attorneys against each other in a battle of words, emotions, filings, proceedings, and finances.
The process of divorce mediation occurs in a calm, quiet place like a private office or conference room with a facilitator emphasizing cooperation and making sure to address both parties' needs. Mediation happens through a neutral approach that focuses on resolving the dispute and not deciding a "winner."
Reason #10: The Process of Mediation is Easier on Children
The heated conflict that can arise during divorce proceedings is unhealthy for children and unproductive. The facilitator in the divorce mediation process minimizes stress and fighting to help foster a working relationship between the parties for the kids' benefit.
Reason #9: Creates Amicable Co-Parenting by Putting the Kids First
By creating a working relationship between the parents and avoiding the adversarial court trial, they can better focus on their children's actual parenting and needs. Divorce mediation puts the children first. The facilitator works with the parents to focus on their children's best interests by creating an amicable parenting plan.
Reason #8: More Stability Post-Divorce
A facilitator of divorce mediation looks to better the communication between the parties. Although the marriage is over, a different kind of relationship forms if children are involved. Fostering better communication skills allows for a stable co-parenting relationship once the divorce is final.
Reason #7: Less Agonizing Than a Court Battle and Better for Emotional Well-Being
There are no sides to take in divorce mediation, no wins or losses, and no adversarial stage. It is a peaceful process that lays aside the hurt and resentful feelings and instead focuses on the future.
How this relationship ends will affect the next intimate relationship. With a facilitator helping the couple manage emotions, communicate interests and needs, and negotiate good decisions together, each party has hope for a better life moving forward.
Reason #6: Fits Your Schedule with Weekend and Evening Appointments Available
Life is already complicated, throw in a divorce, and the world gets flipped turned upside down. (As the Fresh Prince would say.) An already busy life schedule with work, the kid's activities, and everything else make finding the time for a divorce problematic.
Divorce mediationoffers flexibility in scheduling sessions. Many attorneys and mediators provide weekend and evening appointments, so those personal and professional obligations are kept without interruption.
Reason #5: Settles All Divorce Issues
Can you imagine never having to step foot in a courtroom for your divorce? It is possible. If done in good faith by both parties, divorce mediation can resolve all issues of divorce. You are setting up the grounds for a mutual consent divorce filed and approved by the court.
Just because a couple chooses divorce mediation does not necessarily mean they won't stay out of court. If the couple cannot come to any agreement, they can take it to court to decide the fate of the divorce.
Reason #4: Saves Time
Divorce litigation can drag on for months, even years, in some cases. By mediating the divorce, the process is sped up. There's no waiting time on the court's already busy docket. Mediation happens on your time and schedule.
Mutually agreeing on the terms of your divorce through mediation means you can finalize the process in just a matter of weeks or months, depending on how agreeable you and your ex can be about the compromise.
Reason #3: 100% Confidential
The thing about the courts, they are public, which means your divorce is a public record. Not everyone wants their dirt spilled to the media-consuming masses. Divorce mediation does not involve the courts, making the whole thing confidential—keeping your business yours and nobody else's.
Reason #2: Costs Much Less Than Divorce Litigation
Each case will vary, depending on the number of sessions it takes to complete the process since mediation is a service charged by the hour. Those hourly rates depend on the attorney or mediator you decide to work with and range from $100 to $300 per hour.
Reason #1: Control of the Outcome of the Divorce is In Your Hands
The facilitator of divorce mediation helps keep the couple focused, avoid confrontation, and steer the conversation away from conflict. In other words, they're just in the room to make sure an agreement is worked on, and no one comes to blows.
By choosing an attorney to mediate the divorce, you get family law expertise to ensure the agreement is 100% legal and binding. Since mediation involves neutrality, the couple needs to agree on the attorney who would be the mediator.